Not your average dream

I recently lost two dogs. CoCo passed from Cushings disease on April 3rd and Taterbug passed from congestive heart failure on June 6th. I have cried a million tears for those little dogs. I loved them a lot and miss them immensley. My wife had a visitation from CoCo that I recounted in a posting from earlier. I, however, had not had a dream or anything about them. I was just a tad bit jealous but did not say anything. This is what gives me chills, even as I type this. This morning, my alarm clock went off. I hit the snooze button which gives me 9 more minutes of sleep. I dozed back off and immediately, Taterbug came to me in a dream, squinting her eyes like she used to do when she would give me, "beautiful eyes". Her little tail was wagging and she appeared different. I bent to pick her up and realized, she was younger. I started crying, in my sleep as I picked her up. It was so real, I felt her in my hands again. Then, the dang alarm went back off and I had to get up, tears still rolling down my face. I recounted the dream to my wife and she said, "I just had the exact same dream, was she giving you "beautiful eyes"? I said yes and she started crying saying that the dream she had was at the exact time and was exactly the same. I was blown away that me and my wife could have the same dream at the same time. We cried for 10 minutes about how pretty Taterbug was and that it had to be Taterbug visiting, letting us know that she is fine and not old and frail anymore. I would not have believed it if I had not experienced it. I now await CoCo. I figure Taterbug will show him how to visit us. It has given me a sense of peace that I have not had until now. If CoCo comes to me, I think it would complete the circle and life would go on, not as beautiful as when they were alive but it will go on.

CoCo made his presence known

It was 4/3/2010 that my sweet little Shih tzu, CoCo passed away from complications from Cushings disease. Not a day has passed that I have not eventually broke into tears. Now, CoCo loved me but he absolutely worshipped my wife. When he died, she took it even harder than me. Anyway, she called me this morning, crying her eyes out. She said she was busy making breakfast, which was CoCo's favorite time of the day. He would be in the kitchen right under her feet waiting on her to finish. She said the other three dogs were sleeping, so it was basically silent except for bacon frying in the pan. CoCo had a very distinct way of getting your attention if he thought you did not notice him waiting. He would snort, and then you would hear him say, "harrumph", which would always make us laugh and smile. Well, she said she heard that loudly in the silence. CoCo' little lifelong companion, Lexi, immediately woke up and her tail started wagging. My wife called me, crying her eyes out. I told her that CoCo was just letting her and Lexi know that he was still with them. It was a sign. Ironically it has been exactly one month since he died. I told her not to cry but rejoice in the fact that his love was so strong it reached across the chasm between life and death to communicate his love. That is true undying love. Hopefully, he will come to me in my dreams or similiarly and give me some inner peace knowing that he knew how very much we loved him.

Do you remember?

I was sitting at work thinking of my two lost little ones. I have to do that so I can keep them fresh in my memory. But one thing that kept flashing into my mind was the first day that I got them.

I got Taterbug about two weeks after we lost our albino chihuahua, Caesar in the summer of 1997. Caesar was killed by a male Dalmatian after he went sniffing a female Dalmatians rear end. Kind of an inglorious way to go, but that was my little Caesar. We grieved and cried for about two weeks when my wife told me of a woman that had a littler of chihuahua pups with no papers. Seems like her and her soon-to-be ex husband were divorcing. One owned the Mama and one owned the Daddy do and neither would provide the other with papers to make them officially "chihuahua's". Reluctantly, I agreed to go look at them. When I got there, there were only 4 pups left. And the scrawniest, shyest, one of them all crawled towards me and looked up at me. It was love at first sight. That was my "Taterbug". I gave the lady $100.00 for her and scooped Taterbug up and put her in my shirt pocket. She was so small that you could not even tell that I had anything in my pocket. Being brindle, she looked just like a little tiger cub kitten. As a matter of fact, people would ask me if she was a kitten. She wasn't she was a chihuahua. I took her home and surprised my kids with her. She literally grew up with them. I miss that old girl. She lived through a lot of good times and bad times with us. I know she is in Heaven now, no longer old, but young and healthy.

CoCo was a little different story. Our next door neighbor had CoCo and his little half-sister, a silky tzu, Lexi, living on her back deck. It was about a 5x10 area with no shelter from the sun, rain, cold, or whatever the weather was doing. And their hair was so matted they were miserable. Everytime we came home my wife would step over and say "Hello" to them. They were a stinky little mass of hair. For those that have had shih-tzu's and silky tzu's, you know how quickly that can happen. My wife kept saying she was going to get those dogs from our neighbor. Anyway, one day I come home from work and she had done it. She talked the lady into giving us both dogs. My wife was on the back porch with clippers shaving them down as best she could. When she finished I told her, "Those dogs look like fire victims". It DID make them more comfortable. My wife said the woman eagerly agreed to give them to us because, in her words, "They stink and they eat poopoo". I fell head over heels in love with them from the first day. CoCo had such a comical personality. He was always grinning. He was hard to housetrain though. What we did was buy Pampers diapers and alter them to fit him, until he got the hang of it. He was so embarassed by the diapers. I think my other dogs laughed at him. He eventually got the hang of it and didn't peepee anymore in the house. I love that little smiling boy so much. I wish he was still here with us.

In memorium

While grieving the loss of my precious, bow-legged shih tzu, CoCo, and my little gray-face brindle chihuahua, Taterbug, memories came flooding back to me about my other little ones that are already in Heaven awaiting my arrival.
Taterbug-13 year old brindle chihuahua-died from congestive heart failure
CoCo-Shih tzu- died from Cusings disease
Caesar-albino Chihuahua-killed by a male dalmation
Molly-Cocker Spaniel-died from colic (I think)
Sassy-Rottweiler-died from demedectic mange
Daisy-Rottweiler-Parvo
Judu-Chihuahua-died giving birth to Jean
Jean-died at birth
Prissy-Border Collie-died in a freak car accident
Queenie-mixed mutt-died from skin infection on the way to the vet
Champ-German Shepard-died from poison from next door neighbor
Bubbles-Chihuahua-died of old age
Zipper and Bullet-German Shepard Pups-died from distemper right after we got them
Wallop-Australian Border Collie-died after being ran over by a popsicle man, right in front of my house and with 20 kids watching. He did it purposefully and went to jail if I remember correctly.
Lucky-little mixed puppy, my first as a child-ran over by a train

Each of these little dogs helped me build more and more love towards all dogs. They were with me at every good time or bad time in my life. These are those that I wish to reunite with when my Forever day comes. I went from the most recent back to the first. I loved each and everyone of them with all my heart. It is a shame that their lifespan is not equal to ours but I think there is a purpose in that. God wants us to spread our love over many years and if they lived as long as we do, then we would keep that one special friend forever and not enjoy the love of others. Each of these dogs owns a piece of my heart. I hope they are patiently awaiting my arrival in Paradise

I had some friends

My Friend



I had a friend for many years,

We met before the day

Where Father Time had touched his face

And streaked his hair with gray.



We met when I was very young.

He held me in his arm

And softly whispered in my ear

"You'll never come to harm."



"You have my heart my little friend,

I'll never leave your side

No matter what will come along

Our souls forever tied."



So I went home, to my surprise

My sister came with me

And while she liked the strange old man,

She clearly did not see.



He was much more than one to wake

For breakfast at the dawn,

Or one to let us go outside

And play upon the lawn.



He loved me even in the days

I couldn't come and play.

He'd hold my head and stroke my chin

Bend close and softly say,



"What's wrong my boy, come out and play,

Come join me in the sun."

And though I'd try to play with him

My playing days were done.



I'll not forget when last I saw

My big and gentle friend.

He held my head and stroked my side

I knew this was the end.



Although I tried to lick his hand,

My eyes began to close,

And as I was about to leave

A tear caressed my nose.



So now I wait outside a gate,

The sun is warm and bright.

The fields are green and water sweet

With stars so bright at night.



And though I've yet to step inside

These gates of pearly white,

The sound of music ventures forth

And warms my heart at night.



For now, I'll wait. It won't be long,

My path will soon be free.

My friend will walk me through the gate

You see . . . he'd wait for me.

To CoCo and Taterbug

For my babies

How I long to touch you
Just like I did before
Scratch you behind your ears
And hold you just once more
Your time with me was much too short
I love you so very much
You have went to Heaven to await me
And, I no longer feel your touch
But your spirit is right here with me
Until my dying days
You knew without doubt, the love I felt
And our love will never go away
So Taterbug and CoCo To God I give you back, mournful to the end
Until the day, we are re-joined And my heart is on the mend

I love you two little babies

The Eyes of a Dog

What do the eyes of a dog tell you or show you? I believe, when we look into the eyes of a dog, we see the face of God. I believe we feel the love of God shining in our faces. I believe when we look into the eyes of a dog, we see undying pure love and devotion. I believe when we look into the eyes of a dog, we see wonderment in life and nature. We see the glee in a new chew toy. We also see innocence, beauty, friendship, dreams, adventure and many, many wonderful things. I believe if we look closely enough at them, our dogs can see the same things in our eyes while looking into the windows of our soul. A dog's eyes can show you a glint of mischeviousness, a glimmer of hope and sparkles of love. Our dogs show us all these things and all they ask is that we pay attention and see these wonderful things they are showing to us. Are you paying attention?